I thought my kidnap, torture and ultimate murder of Dan the duck would outrage the world, lead to uprisings in the streets, and of course see a modest uplift in traffic to my blog.
Oh, my naivety. After an initial muttering of discontent about Dan's impending doom, the protestors have scuttled back to the far more interesting blogs from whence they came.
I am left consoling a daughter mourning a duck, and avoiding a piranha sharpening her incisors. My only other audience appears to be the DLF (Duck Liberation Front) who seem hell bent on attaching some form of exploding device to my car.
But things get even worse. It appears I have carried out a copyduck crime. http://croz.livejournal.com/
I have two courses of action: 1. Stop perpetrating this despicable act. 2. Plunge to new depths of dastardly duck evilness.
After careful consideration, I have decided to cut off one of his toes.